Soiled Saints

One of the most defining weekends in my life.

Wow, I just realized this is going to be harder than I thought. 

This is going to take a while.  Here are some particulars and then I’ll fill in teh rest.

February 16-17.  Nokia Theater

David Crowder, Kristian Stanfill, Chris Tomlin.

Louie Giglio, Francis Chan.

6,000 people.

And a weekend that I’ll never forget as long as I live.

More to come,

Jason

….and I’ll get back to going through my year.

Max’s funeral is scheduled for Saturday.  However, they may have to move it to the George R. Brown Convention center (one of the five largest such buildings in the U.S.) due to the sheer number of people they are expecting to attend.

The paradox is, if Max were here in physical form, he’d be wondering what all the fuss over him is about.  Yet…..all the fuss is both deserved and worth it.

While I miss him, I can’t wait until Saturday when many will gather to thank God for a live well lived.

Jason

I’m a Facebook fan.  I’m on it, and I even use the new edition, which has been labelled heresy by many.  One of the features of Facebook is the friend “poke.”  I’m not sure what the purpose of the poke is, but I get poked by a few people all the time.  One of the people who would continually poke me is Max Torres.  Nearly everytime I log on to Facebook, I get poked by Max.

Max Torres.  For the three of you who read this, you probably don’t know his name.  And that’s a shame, because you should.  Who is Max Torres you ask?

One of the most gentle men I’ve ever known.

One of the most humble men I’ve ever known.

One of the most passionate men about helping people without an expectation of human return but with a God-sized expectation of divine return of joy I’ve ever known.

One of the most loving people (both of God and his fellow man) I’ve ever known.

I have known Max for at least five years.  In those last five years, I’ve learned:

Humility:  Max was a humble man.  Even though he had the coolest hair for a guy post-40 I’ve ever seen, and was a great blogger, technicially with it, had a Harley, and was very intelligent, what you most see is amazing humility.  When he was honored at various gatherings, largely due to the fact that if you were involved in urban ministries in Houston, you’ve heard of Max Torres, for he is a legend in this city, Max would largely shrug it off, quick to say that God was good, and he was not-so-good, which was even more forceful, for he knew that God’s activity and anointing was on him.  Max’s humility attracted people to rally behind him and follow him as he followed the Christ he loved.

Tenderness:  Max had deep compassion for…well…everyone.  No one was not a brother or sister.  Everyone was Max’s brother or sister.  His love for a person was so authentic, and ran deep.  God used Max to dull my sharp edges.  I learned to be tender when I wanted to be tough.

Passion:   Max had passion about seeing at-risk kids develop to their full potential and using their God-given gifts and talents for the glory of God.  He had a passion for living life and arranging all of that life under the umbrella of divine instruction and direction.  Max was passionate about seeing remedy come to the hard-to-reach and hard-of-heart.

Love:  This kind of goes with the above, Max loved his family, his kids, both by blood and not by blood, and his Jesus. The one defining characteristic of Max Torres is love.  He knew a love only a divine Father has for His children.  That love defined Max, his life, his ministry, everything.  Max was one of the most loving men I’ve ever known.

Family:  If you were around Max for very long, you knew he was proud of his wife and his kids.  Max was a devoted Christ-honoring husband and father.  I was always struck by how quick he was to share some comment about how his sons or wife were doing, and I never, NEVER heard him say anything negative, derogatory, or harsh about his family.  I always  was struck by how devoted to his family Max was.

Max is dead.  Someone in a van, with neither a driver’s license nor insurance took my friends’ life in an auto accident this morning.

Someone who had NO BUSINESS DRIVING took a husband from his wife.  A father from his three sons.  A teacher from his students.  A mentor to students who otherwise wouldn’t care or be cared for.  A father to many who had no father.

There is a mix of rage and lament within me right now…..  How could God take a guy who was making such a difference for His kingdom in such a way? 

Why couldn’t God take someone else instead?

Then I wonder……who would I volunteer to be the replacement?

I don’t have that kind of wisdom.  I’m not sure I want that kind of wisdom.

I’ll leave that into the hands of God.  I’m grateful for the privilege of knowing Max, and of God impacting my life through his life. 

God kissed me on the cheek and poked me on the heart through the life and ministry of Max Torres, and I’m grateful. 

I opened up my Facebook today after hearing the news, and there it was, a poke by Max.  Perhaps if I leave the poke there unaltered by my reception of it, maybe the reality of his being gone won’t hit me as hard.  He’ll always be there to poke me.  To prod me.  I know, I know……I know better than that.  But you can’t blame a guy for trying.

I’ll miss you Max.  Many others will miss you more.  I thank God for what He let you do for His glory.

Pax,

Jason

I began the year on the shelf.  I was on sabbatical.  Six weeks off with no responsibilities but to rest.  So, I did a whole lot o’ nothing.  I did very few things at the church, and no one was upset about it.  Looking back, knowing what I know now, and what went down shortly after I returned, I wouldn’t have taken the sabbatical simply to savor the moments I could have had with friends that while still friends, aren’t apart of the same church anymore.

On my break, I went to different churches.  I went to two different Methodist megachurches, a Chinese church, and an African-American church in which I was the only vanilla in the house.  I had some amazing experiences and times of worship with people much different than myself, which was good for me.

Early on in my sabbatical, I actually met Louie Giglio in a church bathroom.  I was in Irving (near Dallas) for a meeting about the February 2008 Passion conference in Dallas.  I’m coming out of the bathroom, and in walks Louie.  He looked like he didn’t feel well, which was confirmed in the meeting.  I wanted to talk to him, pick his brain, etc.  but instead, let him go to the bathroom in peace.  “How’s it going Mr. Giglio” was all I was able to blurt out. 

One week before sabbatical I went to the emergency room for something weird with my heart.  (Not the pacemaker)  Seems as if a supplement I took didn’t agree with me, which led to a completely sleepless night.  By the next day, I was okay.  Scared, but okay.

The main event of my sabbatical was Passion ’08 Regional Conference in Dallas.  And that deserves it’s own blog entry….which it will receive.

Where I’m going:  The beginning of a new venture.  The end of an era.  The end of an era part 2.  The end of an era part three.

I’m not good about putting links, and embedding stuff in this thing, but you have to simply click his name on the right hand side of this page, and read his Sunday Summary, but also read his comments on the election.

Read thoroughly and think deeply.

Rob’s absolutely right.

More to come,

jason

Well, November 4th has come and gone.  And change has definitely come.  We were guaranteed of that either way the vote went.

The emails i’ve received have been a tad wild as well.  Some are very apphrehensive of the change to come, thinking that we will go down into the dumps due to our new president-elect.  However, some have thought of this as a milestone (in a good way) acheivement, that perhaps finally, the racial spirit that has loomed despite some of our best (and worst) efforts, has been disspelled.  Many of my black friends have yearned for such a day for many years.  And to them, it’s not a race thing. 

I’ve been privileged to walk alongside some great men and women over the last near-four years as part of an urban leadership initiative called DVULI. (DeVos Urban Leadership Initiative)  There were 12 of us, and I was the only white guy in the bunch.  Before DVULI, I would have sympathized with some of the emails i received in the past 30 hours from my more white brethren.  You know, logical concern and care over our next president’s policies, beliefs, etc.  (Logical described exactly ONE friend’s emails.  The rest…not-so-logical.)

And then I got to walk a mile (and fly many thousands more) next to my black friends’ shoes.  For one friend, (and I suspect more) Barack Obama’s ascension to the presidency is more than a race thing.  It transcends race for him.  For him, it’s a deeply personal, profoundly spiritual thing.  And I can’t say that if I were him, having walked where he’s walked (by the way, a vet of Gulf War 1), and gone through what he’s gone through, that I wouldn’t have the same outlook waking up today.

I guess it’s in a small way a matter of perspective.  Now don’t get me wrong, I am not crazy about either candidate served up on our plates this year.  And I can see valid reasons people have for voting against either party.  John Piper has concerns about Palin.  He also has concerns about Obama.  I share those concerns, and not just because I’m a Piper fan.  But still, now that 11.4 has passed, I need to change.

I support my country, and appreciate the democratic process.  I will do what the guy I voted for is doing.

Who’s that you ask?

Doesn’t matter now.  What matters is that we pray for God’s grace and wisdom to rest heavily on our current president, and our soon-to-be president.  i need to change in that way by praying. 

NOTE:  Speaking of change, there will be a soon-coming change to this blog:  Starting in the next couple of days, I am going to countdown what may be my wildest year yet as a member of the human race.  There have been thrill rides and laments.  What an amazing time to be alive, and I’ll begin to recall that time soon.

Until then,

Jason